Spiritual Tune-ups for Couples
/CARISSA PLUTA
Those of you who have musical abilities will know how important it is to have your instrument tuned periodically in order for the sound to remain melodious.
PHOTOGRAPHY: MEL WATSON PHOTOGRAPHY
If we put that much care and effort into maintaining our piano or guitar, how much more time and energy should we invest in maintaining the spiritual health of our marriages?
We don’t want to wait until we hit a season of difficulty or desolation in our relationship before taking the steps necessary to evaluate and meet our spiritual needs.
Taking time with your spouse for a “spiritual tune-up” can benefit both married and engaged couples and can strengthen your relationship for the long-term.
Talk about your spiritual life
This first one may seem obvious, but it may surprise you how easy it is forgotten.
You can share what God has been saying to you in prayer, or ask your spouse questions about his prayer life. This can lead to deeply edifying discussions and makes for interesting dinner or date night conversations!
Talking about your prayer life is helpful for couples to better understand the spiritual needs of each individual and the marriage as a whole. It also helps foster a deeper emotional intimacy between you and your husband.
Head to Confession
As a sacrament of healing, Confession grants the faithful necessary graces for avoiding sin and growing in holiness, which is why going to confession at least once a year is considered a tenant of our faith. But why wait? This grace is available to you as often as you want to take advantage of it.
My husband and I try to go to confession together once a month. We usually do it on a Saturday and make a little date out of it by grabbing coffee and donuts afterwards.
Going to confession with your spouse can be a great way of being more intentional with maintaining the spiritual health of your marriage.
Go on a Retreat
For many couples, the Engaged Encounter Weekend is the first and last retreat you and your husband go on together but it doesn’t have to be.
Devoting a day, or even a whole week to spending time in prayer can leave you feeling spiritually refreshed and renewed, and can help you dive back into your daily tasks with a greater fervor and love.
While you could choose to go on separate retreat weekends or plan your own personal one, you may also consider attending a retreat designed specifically for couples.
Read a spiritually enriching book
Reading books from great theologians, philosophers, and (current or future) saints can greatly benefit those striving for holiness and a relationship with Christ. And luckily, the Church offers us a treasure trove of spiritual classics from which to learn.
Reading a spiritually-enriching book can help build up the intellectual foundation of your faith, while also giving you practical tips to apply these topics in your life and marriage. It can also offer encouragement in your vocation and journey toward heaven.
You and your spouse might choose to spend time reading the book together during the week, or read it on your own time and then discuss the major takeaways.
Related: Check out some of our reading recommendations for couples.
Consider Counseling
Counseling isn’t just for individuals and marriages that are actively facing a major problem. In fact, most experts would say that couples should seek therapy long before they think they need to.
Counseling provides couples with tools and techniques to help them improve communication, conflict resolution, physical and emotional intimacy, and more--all of which can greatly impact the spiritual health of your relationship.
