How to Avoid Fights about Money
/CARISSA PLUTA
Much stress and many arguments in a marriage often result over money.
In fact, studies have shown that money is the number one issue couples fight about. But it doesn’t have to be.
Here are some ways to help you and your spouse avoid those dreaded money fights.
Talk about your financial history
Many marriage prep programs include discussion on finances but they don’t always dive as deep as they should. You and your partner should not only talk about how much debt you might be bringing to a marriage, but also about each individual’s “money mindset.”
How was money talked about in your home growing up? How do you feel about how it was talked about? Are you a spender or a saver?
Getting to the root of your money mindset can help them better understand their significant other, and help you as a couple to make adjustments.
Share your expectations
Many arguments in marriage result because of misunderstandings. If the couple does not clearly communicate their expectations when it comes to finances, it will likely result in an argument.
Will you have a joint bank account when you get married? Will you need to discuss with one another before making large purchases?
Sharing your expectations when it comes to money with your spouse or fiancé can help eliminate any confusion between the individual philosophies. It also allows the couple to have more meaningful conversations about finances, that will help avoid potential future arguments.
Set financial goals together
When my husband and I got married, we had several large student loans that we needed to pay off so getting out of debt became our major financial focus. But as we near the end of our student loans, we have shifted our focus on saving for the future.
What do you hope to accomplish in the realm of personal finances? Do you want to get out of debt? Do you want to buy a house? Save for your kids to go to college? Discuss your hopes and dreams with your significant other.
Laying out your desires will motivate you and your spouse to achieve them and help you create a more organized plan to meet these goals.
Create a budget and stick to it!
Whether you are trying to get out of debt or trying to save, making a budget with your partner can help.
After calculating your monthly income, create a budget that reflects your goals and family’s vision. How much will you save? How much will you tithe? Will you put aside money for a date night out or for a child’s birthday?
Be sure to revisit this budget monthly and adjust it to meet your family’s needs. A monthly finance meeting can help keep communication about money between spouses open, honest, and stress-free.
