Wedding Jewelry | How Your Engagement Ring Can Be a Means of Evangelization

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JAY ROSS

 

Weddings are all about “the first:” The first time we plan a major event. The first photo shoot. The first time you buy  a high-quality cake and plan a large catering event. The first time you’re fit for high-end clothing--maybe the first time you’ve seen a tailor. The first time you buy serious jewelry. In a lot of ways, it can seem like we have to invent everything for the first time. 

It can seem like marriage itself has never been done before and that we are blazing the path to do it right--especially with the multitude of options out there.

As a jeweler, I see this with wedding rings and I bet you do, too. When you observe jewelry trends and friends’ and family members’ wedding rings, you can see that they look a lot different than they have in the past 50 years. A lot of these rings aren’t even what we would consider jewelry 20 years ago--rings made of nylon, wood, titanium--even antlers. 

With this redefinition of the wedding ring it’s hard to be able to predict what your spouse-to-be might love.

As you begin designing or shopping for a ring, consider that the materials can take on a spiritual significance and be a witness to a loving God. 

Saint John Paul the Great wrote this Instruction, titled Redemptionis Sacrementum, on liturgical norms: 

[117.] Sacred vessels for containing the Body and Blood of the Lord must be made in strict conformity with the norms of tradition and of the liturgical books...It is strictly required, however, that such materials be truly noble in the common estimation within a given region, so that honor will be given to the Lord by their use, and all risk of diminishing the doctrine of the Real Presence of Christ in the Eucharistic species in the eyes of the faithful will be avoided. Reprobated, therefore, is any practice of using for the celebration of Mass common vessels, or others lacking in quality, or devoid of all artistic merit or which are mere containers....” (emphasis added)

This passage is about chalices. But after reading it, I found it incredibly important to me to educate whoever I meet about this since I realized that it is my calling is to make sacred objects of another type,one that nearly all faithful will wear at some point in their lives--rings. 

My friend Carlos Sacasa, a Canon Lawyer and speaker on prayer and Catholic tradition, says  “[Chalices]...the inner lining that touches to host and the body and blood of Jesus Christ has to be gold.”

This was enlightening. I asked, “Why gold?”

“It is a precious metal.” 

Only precious metals are supposed to be touching the host; it is a sign of reverence. Usually in the most traditional chalices they are lined with gold. As with rings, it’s actually an ancient tradition going back to the very beginning.

In Genesis 24:34-58, Abraham wants to find a wife for his son, Isaac, so he sends his servant, who finds her through a sign from God. When the servant finds her, he gives her a gold ring as a symbol of the betrothal.

So what does it say when choosing rings made of gold? It is a sign of reverence. For those who choose it, the more gold content in the ring, the purer, and the higher the karat, which can mirror the purity of your love. It also reflects the history of our faith: Scripture contains plenty of references to the purity of gold, to refining, to the crucible in both the Old and New Testaments. (Gold, of course, goes back to Exodus and is mentioned even in the creation section of Genesis--Gen. 2:12)). Diamonds are not mentioned--that doesn’t mean you can’t include them, but if a Scripturally rich ring interests you, consider that investing in a higher karat gold can ultimately amount to a similar price point as diamonds would.

In addition to materials, give some thought to the process itself. At our company, my wife and I ask clients to share their intentions as we are melting the gold for their wedding rings; we are honored to bring to God in the melting of this metal and the creation of their rings.

Any jeweler should be able to keep a small part of the materials from your engagement ring to be incorporated into your wedding rings when you purchase those. The pieces will be melted together, all three pieces of the same whole. A beautiful representation of the trinity. 

Lastly, consider the symbolism of certain stones and faith elements in your rings. In my company’s own experience, we’ve created rings that represented the sacrament of marriage, in a way that told the unique love story of the couple who bought them: in Texas the anastasis of Jesus Christ was incorporated (we used carved lilies and crosses to represent death and resurrection of both Jesus Christ’s passion and the death and resurrection of marriage). In Chicago, we represented the trinity using Celtic knots--and a mission trip to Tanzania using Tanzanite. We’ve done Melkite imagery. Stem lilies for St. Joseph. Anchors of Stella Mar. The list goes on. 

Artistic merit is not only present in these pieces of sacramental jewelry--it is fittingly representative of a Catholic sacrament. Feel free to email me at jesse@thirtyonefour.com even if you’re not our customer; I can help with the process of budgeting for labor and materials with any jeweler.

What, then, do you think she’s going to do when people ask your bride about her ring? She is going to evangelize. She is going to bring them home to Jesus Christ.

Here, my tips for incorporating these elements of evangelization with any jeweler you work with. 

Ask your jeweler about custom designing a ring with elements of your faith.

When they cast this ring in gold (some jewelers are only resellers that won’t be able to do this, but it’s easy enough to find one who makes the jewelry there in the shop), ask them to pray for your intentions.

Choose a higher karat.

Additionally, if you want stones for a ring, we (or any jeweler in your town) can walk you through the process of spending at a low price point for a cubic zirconia to a bigger investment for a beautiful gemstone like sapphire, emerald, ruby, or a synthetic or genuine diamond. The point is to at least be cognizant of the purchase and not to put all the weight there on the stone, but to redistribute the spending so you can make a more meaningful statement not only to your fiancée, but ultimately to the world at large, using the language of jewelry.

About the Author: Jay holds an MFA from the University of Central Florida. Jay and his wife Angie are Co-Founders of 31:Four Artisan Jewelry--an all-Catholic design and manufacturing studio based in the Orlando area. They are teaching the trade to their four children, who will be fourth-generation jewelers.

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