Meaningful and Budget-Friendly Wedding Gifts for Catholic Couples

DOMINIKA RAMOS

During my college and newlywed years, I always scanned friends' wedding registries for that perfect gift that seemed both personal and also wouldn't cost me a small fortune. 

Even now I'm in no position to buy someone their longed-for Le Creuset dishware set and I wince when I find everything within my budget has been already purchased.

But I've found both as a recipient and giver of many wedding gifts that some of the best gifts are not listed on the registry at all but come from deeply personal and out-of-the-box thinking:

Handwritten advice

One good friend asked older married couples she knew to write us letters with marriage advice. We read the stack of them on our honeymoon which made for an encouraging and practical start to our marriage.

Book Bouquet

Another friend gifted me Alessandro Manzoni's The Betrothed as part of a bachelorette party gift which has since inspired me with one of my favorite ideas for an off-beat and affordable gift: a book bouquet--that is, a stack of books tied up with ribbon.  

There are several used book websites where lots of great books fall in the under $5 range, and the possibilities are delightfully endless. 

You could do spiritual books like Fulton Sheen's Three to Get Married and John Paul II's Love and Responsibility, great literature like Pride and Prejudice and Anna Karenina, collections of love poems, or lighthearted mysteries featuring couples like Agatha Christie's married sleuths, Tommy and Tuppence, or Dorothy Sayers' inimitable duo, Peter Wimsey and Harriet Vane. You could also find a beautiful coffee table book related to the bride or groom's interests and pair it with some thrifted favorites.

Check out some other recommended reading for Catholic brides and newly married couples here.

Honey Mead

A wedding gift I often give is a bottle of honey mead. The origin of the term 'honeymoon' comes from the custom of couples drinking honey mead during the first month of their marriage for good luck. But there's a spiritual significance here too as St. Valentine, patron of happy marriages, is also a patron of beekeepers.

A Unique Twist on a Spiritual Bouquet

Lastly, the most appreciated gift we received for our wedding were prayers. A couple of our guests wrote out incredibly thoughtful and detailed spiritual bouquets for us, and I've loved thinking of how many graces were sent with us into our marriage thanks to their prayers. 

A fun idea is to pair a spiritual bouquet with some seed packets. Many flowers or herbs are attached with spiritual legends and meanings, and at the same time, you can help a couple get started on a Mary garden or a windowsill herb garden.

Whatever your situation in life, these suggestions work as stand-alone gifts or pair well with something traditionally off the registry, but in my case, it's been these kinds of thoughtful and creative gifts that have held the dearest place in my heart.

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About the Author: Dominika Ramos is a stay-at-home mom to three and lives in Houston, Texas. She runs a creative small business, Pax Paper.

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Join Our Team! Features Editor & Social Media Volunteers

Through discernment, and with our gratitude for the growth of the Spoken Bride community, we are excited to announce we’re expanding our team! We’re eager to work with individuals who share in our passion for Catholic marriage, with an eye for beauty and a voice of authenticity.

Spoken Bride is seeking one full-time Features Editor, one volunteer Twitter Manager, & one volunteer Pinterest Manager. Applications are open through Friday, January 22.

Our ideal candidates are collaborative-minded servant leaders with original, creative takes on Catholic wedding-related content and an eye for growing and expanding our ministry. Above all, candidates should have a heart for Spoken Bride’s mission and for the sacrament of marriage. Experience with writing, digital marketing/PR, weddings, and/or theology is ideal.

Feeling called to apply? Find information and application forms for each position below.

Features Editor

The Features Editor will handle all facets of managing, editing, designing, and scheduling proposal and wedding submissions for Spoken Bride’s blog. This is a remote position with compensation.

Responsibilities include:

• Responding to brides’ and vendors’ wedding submissions with acceptance or rejection

• Editing and composing submissions into narrative form for weekly features on Spoken Bride’s blog and social media

• Arranging and importing wedding images for features

• Ensuring correct vendor attribution and links for all published features

• Team communication via email, text, and calls

Qualifications:

Our Features Editor should possess significant narrative composition ability and the ability to write with flawless grammar and mechanics. A strong candidate should be excellent at creating informative, engaging content that builds trust and relatability with readers and embodies Spoken Bride's mission. Experience with journalism/composition and the wedding industry are a plus.

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Social Media Volunteer Team: Twitter Manager & Pinterest Manager

The Social Media Volunteer Team will work closely with the Social Media Manager to design, compose, schedule, post, and engage with daily content on Spoken Bride’s Twitter and Pinterest accounts.

Responsibilities include:

• Composing and scheduling daily posts

• Daily engagement with followers and users on each respective platform

• Initiative for continued education and innovation in the constantly changing field of social media

• Team communication via email, text, and calls

We look forward to hearing from you!

Announcing Our First Black Friday Event! We're Here to Serve You Today Through Cyber Monday

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Whatever you need for your wedding and gift list, we’ve got you.

This weekend, we’re offering the beautiful, practical, and distinctively Catholic products in our Shop at a limited-time discount--so it’s easier than ever to simplify your wedding plans, shop for the women in your life, and prepare for married life with your whole heart. 

Mark your calendar now for these upcoming sales:

Friday, November 27: All wedding programs $10 off

Saturday, November 28: All prints, $5

Sunday, November 29: 10% off all tees, mugs, & totes

Monday, November 30: 15% off our Catholic Wedding Workbook & Mini Guide Sets

Wherever you are in your engagement or newlywed journey, we’d love to serve you. See you there!

Join Our Team | Social Media Volunteer Team

We are excited to announce we are expanding the Spoken Bride team! We’re eager to work with individuals who share in our passion for Catholic marriage, with an eye for beauty and a voice of authenticity.

Spoken Bride is seeking a team to manage our social media platforms; specifically, one volunteer each for Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram Stories, & our Instagram Feed. Applications are open through Monday, November 30.

Our ideal candidates are collaborative-minded servant leaders who desire to use social media as an avenue for relationship, community, and growth.

Above all, candidates should have a heart for Spoken Bride’s mission and for the sacrament of marriage. Experience with writing, digital marketing/PR, weddings, and/or theology is ideal.

Feeling called to apply? Find further information and an application form below.

Social Media Team: Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram Stories, & Instagram Feed Managers

The Social Media Team will work closely with the Social Media Manager to design, compose, schedule, post, and engage with daily content on Spoken Bride’s social media platforms.

Each of these positions requests a one-year commitment and is on a volunteer basis.

We look forward to hearing from you! Thank you for considering sharing your gifts and experience with Spoken Bride, and be assured of our prayers.

Join Our Team | Newsletter Manager & Shop Manager

We are excited to announce we are expanding the Spoken Bride team! We’re eager to work with individuals who share in our passion for Catholic marriage, with an eye for beauty and a voice of authenticity.

Spoken Bride is seeking a Shop Manager and Newsletter Manager and is accepting applications through October 23.

Our ideal candidates are collaborative-minded servant leaders with original, creative takes on Catholic wedding-related content and an eye for growing and expanding Spoken Bride’s ministry. 

Above all, candidates should have a heart for Spoken Bride’s mission and for the sacrament of marriage. Experience with writing, digital marketing/PR, weddings, and/or theology is ideal.

Feeling called to apply? Find information and application forms for each position below.

Newsletter Manager

The Newsletter Manager will work closely with the Business Director and Editor in Chief to design, compose, schedule, and send a bimonthly newsletter to Spoken Bride’s email subscribers, offering exclusive content and promoting products and events.

Shop Manager

The Shop Manager will oversee the Spoken Bride Shop by maintaining and updating product listings and providing customer service. This individual will work closely with Spoken Bride’s Business Director to share analytics and employ effective strategies for increased sales and growth.

Each of these positions requests a one-year commitment and is compensated.

We look forward to hearing from you! Thank you for considering sharing your gifts and experience with Spoken Bride, and be assured of our prayers.

The Dating Advice I Would Give My Younger Self

GENEVIEVE ALLEN

The man who was my last first date is not my husband.

But he was my type. Perfectly so. He was tall, dark, and handsome. He was college-educated, pursuing a career in a creative field, well-traveled, and a few years older than me. For our date, he took me to a fairy-lit garden full of live music, wine, and delicious food. He was wearing a light blue Oxford shirt, dark jeans, and a confident expression as we got to know each other over the mid-range red he selected for us.

On paper, this was the most perfect first date I’d ever had. This guy was Dream Date. So how did I end up married to someone else?

PHOTOGRAPHY: FIAT PHOTOGRAPHY

From the age of fifteen, I was almost always in a serious relationship. I dated a few people for long stretches at a time, even if I knew marriage would not likely be the end result. Throughout my decade of serial dating, I considered consulting books about dating with a spiritual perspective; I never read them. Finally, at the age of twenty-five, I decided to consult Jesus.

Weary, like the woman at the well who had had seven husbands but still felt alone, I approached Jesus and asked him to show me what I was doing wrong, and what I needed to do in the future. I saw the array of men I had dated and the attachments I had so easily formed, many of them still intact and causing me pain. Very clearly, I knew I needed to give my dating history over to God and carefully, prayerfully consider how to date going forward.

There was so much peace in my heart as I decided to date intentionally. I would never go on a second date if I couldn’t imagine marrying the person. I wouldn’t fearfully avoid any topics that were important to me: faith, marriage, and kids, for example. 

When I met my husband Dalton, I told him all of this upfront. On our first date at a greasy-spoon diner, I informed him that I would be dating other people, and why. He understood, which surprised me. I continued to see Dalton as I went on other dates. Sometimes I went on one date with a person, sometimes a second or third, but I made no commitments. 

At a Mardi Gras parade about a month later, I met Dream Date. In the parking lot after the date was over, he asked me on a second date. I surprised myself by gently saying no. In spite of the perfection of our date, several things had become clear to me over the previous months and on this date in particular.

Here is some advice I wish I could have given myself before I began dating: 

Age and maturity are related, but they are not the same.

One thing that surprised me about Dalton, my husband, is that although he is five years younger than me, he never seemed immature. In fact, if I tried to guess his age, I would have assumed he was at least as old as me. This was largely due to his quiet confidence and his sense of conviction about what he believed. Dream Date, on the other hand, wasn’t sure what he believed about anything, and he didn’t seem especially interested in figuring it out.

One person for whom age and maturity were related, at least in relationships, was me. It took me ten years and lots of heartbreak to learn how I needed to approach dating. In some aspects of your life, experience will be your best teacher.

You may need to discern. You should never need to wonder.

I wish I had known this. I wish every woman knew this and believed it. 

While dating, you may ask yourself many questions regarding whether you should begin or continue to pursue a relationship. The one question you should NEVER need to ask yourself, at least after a first date, is whether a guy likes you. If he is in any way worth your time, you will know. Even Dream Date, although he wasn’t right for me, was clear in his intentions about this.

Be clear about what you need and what you want in a marriage, and be willing to acknowledge the difference.

It’s crucial to know what you must have in a spouse and what is simply not important. It’s also crucial to know that you may be confused about this. Here’s a tip to help you clarify:

When considering qualities you would like to have in a future husband, make two lists:

The first list should be things you would like to see in him on a first date. Be honest and detailed in your requests. Does he have dark hair and kind eyes? Is he confident as he orders? Does he tell (modestly, and only when you ask) about the fact that he graduated summa cum laude with a Ph.D in 19th century British literature?

The second list should be things you would like to see in him at three in the morning on a night when one of your children is sick. Or when one of you has lost a job. Or when one of your parents has just died. Be honest and detailed in your requests. Is he patient and kind? Does he shoulder his portion of the responsibility? Is he willing to shoulder all of the responsibility if necessary? Can you see yourself laughing with him? Can you see yourself crying, with no makeup and in stained sweats? 

The first list is more fun to make. The second list is vital. Both are important. An ideal husband should have at least a few qualities from the first list, and all, or nearly all, from the second. Keep both lists in mind as you meet new people. Be open-minded, but hold fast to your convictions.

After my last first date, I called up Dalton and told him boldly that I wanted to see him. I had finally learned how to date, just in time to get married.

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About the Author: Genevieve currently practices as a lactation consultant and blogs with her sister Kat Finney for The Sister Post, a blog offering two perspectives on everything from spiritual discernment to baby gear. Genevieve and her husband Dalton began dating on the feast of St. Joseph. They have two children.

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How to Support a Bride When Her Wedding Plans Must Change

CLARA DAVISON

Perhaps it happened a few weeks ago or perhaps you got the text today—around the world, wedding plans are modified because of the Coronavirus. 

In the last month, three of our friends have canceled their weddings, for now. With each cancelation, I was both heartbroken and a bit unsure of how to react as I watched my friends navigate the unique circumstances around wedding planning in 2020.

PHOTOGRAPHY: ELIZABETH M PHOTOGRAPHY

Here are four steps you can take (right now!) to support your friends or fellow brides who have changed their wedding plans:

1. Acknowledge the Loss

Yes, there are extraordinary things happening in the world causing a global heartache. A suspended wedding may not be headline news around the world, however, for your friend, this wedding was the beginning of her marriage and a major event she had meticulously planned with hopes and expectations for who would be present, how it would look, and how it would feel. Do not dismiss her sadness over the cancelled event simply because there are seemingly more tragic things happening around the globe. 

Acknowledge the loss and allow her to express her disappointment in a safe and nonjudgmental space. Affirm her reaction is entirely appropriate, and give her time to process this loss. It is okay to grieve the changes to wedding plans. 

2. Offer Help and Support

Planning a wedding is a huge task; after so much work, canceling and rescheduling the big day can feel like an insurmountable task. At the thought of having to redo months of wedding planning, the bride may feel overwhelmed with the amount of decisions and tasks at hand. 

Reach out with offers of help and support. Can you help call wedding guests with the news? Do vendors need to be coordinated with for the new wedding date? Are there rented decorations that need to be returned? 

Help the bride brainstorm and delegate tasks to family and friends who are willing to help. During a time when everything can feel overwhelming and unknown, it is especially important to make the bride feel she is supported with helping hands.  

3. Continue to Check In

No matter how far in advance a wedding day gets canceled or altered, it is a difficult adjustment. After the initial decision is made, continue to check-in with the bride and let her know you are thinking of her during this unexpected difficulty.  

Can you send a quick text or email letting her know you are praying for them? Can you send a small “thinking of you” gift on the date of the now-canceled bridal shower? Continuing to check-in after the initial decision will help your friend know that their wedding day is important to you too. 

4. Make the Wedding Date Special

Though plans are canceled, couples have several options in how they choose to move forward in pursuit of marriage. Some may postpone the entire wedding while others may have a private ceremony on the original date and a large party at a future date. Regardless of what they choose, their original wedding date will look much different than they initially anticipated.  

If you have a friend who has moved both the ceremony and the reception, make sure you reach out to this bride when her former wedding day arrives. This will be a difficult day for her and it is especially important for her to be surrounded with love. Can you have flowers or cupcakes delivered to her house? Can you mail her a card with a thoughtful note? Can you send her a care package filled with some of her favorite things? Spoken Brides’ Vendor Guide offers creative and thoughtful ideas for gift-giving. 

If you have a friend who is having a private ceremony, see if there are ways you can still be included in this bride’s wedding day! There are many creative ways to celebrate the new marriage during this time. Can someone livestream the wedding for friends and family who cannot be there in person? Can you decorate the car while they are inside the Church? Can you leave cards and gifts outside their new home for them to find after their ceremony?

This year has turned out very different than anyone anticipated; many engaged couples are experiencing this unexpected stress in unique ways. Experiencing this unprecedented adversity will be a foundation of memories and emotions for our entire world—in an extremely personal way for brides and grooms. Showing your soon-to-be-married friends extraordinary support during these extraordinary times is an act of love as they begin their married lives.

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About the Author: Clara Davison has worked as a whitewater raft guide, sex trafficking researcher, U.K. Parliament researcher, swim coach, and freelance writer. She currently works in Brand Management and lives with her husband in North Carolina.   

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"Your Father, Who Sees What is Hidden" | A Collection of Lenten Reflections for Catholic Couples

As we enter the desert of the Lenten season, Christ walks alongside us in hunger and thirst. With us he cries out to the Father, and no movement of the heart goes unseen or unheard. Matthew’s Gospel for Ash Wednesday reads, “...when you fast, anoint your head and wash your face, so that you may not appear to be fasting, except to your Father who is hidden. And your Father who sees what is hidden will repay you.”

In the hidden and the silence, we are known. The Lord sees the most intimate parts of who we are, calling us into deeper communion. What is he whispering to you? What is he asking?

Rosary + Photography: Our Lady’s Armory

Here, to enrich your journey, a collection of Lenten posts from our archives.

Prayer, fasting, + almsgiving

15 ideas for you and your beloved to pray, fast, and give alms | The fruits of making sacrifices as a couple, plus a download for an intentional Lent | The books that transformed one bride’s prayer life

The pain, and fruits, of purification

Change is good. It’s okay that it’s also hard. | “Simply knowing and believing that the man I married is trying his best, and holding myself accountable to do the same, has freed me from tendencies to blame and wallow.” Consider giving up self pity, especially in a season of new parenthood. | “Remember you vowed “until death do us part.” Remember that part of the sacramental vocation of marriage is to prepare your beloved for a saintly death. You are called to help each other to Heaven.”

Liturgical living

Holy Week traditions you can start during engagement and newlywed life | Our Business Director Andi Compton’s favorite way to visibly live out the season in your home | 4 Ways to Embrace Hospitality During Lent

The tension of anticipation and fulfillment

Are you engaged during this Lenten season of waiting? Four habits you can start now to prepare for married intimacy. | Ways to view preparation for marriage through the lens of these holy 40 days

Real couples’ stories

Caty and Ryan’s proposal along the Way of the Cross | Brooke and Tim’s Good Friday engagement | How Emily and John fell in love over 40 days in their campus chapel | Bianca and Vitor’s Holy Week pilgrimage to Rome and Paris engagement | How one of Jaclyn’s Lenten promises led her and Tony to each other 

We humbly ask your prayers for us, as we pray for you, during this sacred time. It is our joy to pray for you and hear from you; don’t hesitate to reach out with your intentions, by DM or at hello@spokenbride.com.

Join Our Team | Social Media Manager + Vendor Coordinator

Through discernment, and with our gratitude for the growth of the Spoken Bride community, we are excited to announce we’re expanding our team! We’re eager to work with individuals who share in our passion for Catholic marriage, with an eye for beauty and a voice of authenticity.

Spoken Bride is seeking a Social Media Manager & a Vendor Coordinator (Administrative Position) and are accepting applications until March 2.

Our ideal candidates are collaborative-minded servant leaders with original, creative takes on Catholic wedding-related content and an eye for growing and expanding our ministry. Above all, candidates should have a heart for Spoken Bride’s mission and for the sacrament of marriage. Experience with writing, digital marketing/PR, weddings, and/or theology is ideal.

Feeling called to apply? Find information and application forms for each position below.

Social Media Manager

The Social Media Manager will handle all facets of scheduling, drafting, and posting for Spoken Bride’s social media platforms, utilizing appropriate strategies and applications for long-term growth and engagement.

Vendor Membership Coordinator (Administrative Position)

The Vendor Membership Coordinator acts as the liaison between Spoken Bride and the small business and professional members of the Spoken Bride Vendor Guide. In this administrative position, the Vendor Coordinator will be responsible for all aspects of vendor membership, serving as the primary point of contact for membership-related questions, recruiting new vendors, and organizing vendor-related events.

Please Note: Both positions are unpaid & volunteer positions with a year commitment.

We look forward to hearing from you! Thank you for considering sharing your gifts and experience with Spoken Bride, and be assured of our prayers.

New Year's Resolutions for Catholic Brides + Couples

Happy New Year from the team at Spoken Bride! 

The start of a new calendar year elicits a natural motivation for new habits, routines and goals. Whether you are embracing the new year in solitude or in collaboration with a significant other, the Spoken Bride archives offer a variety of ideas to kick start a fresh resolution.

PHOTOGRAPHY: FIAT PHOTOGRAPHY

Book and Podcast Recommendations 

A Review of "The Artist of Love" by Alice Hildebrand | Suggestions if you are preparing for marriage this year | Fun reads featuring strong marriages | Podcasts for women

Encouragement for Physical Fitness Goals 

A Catholic approach to fitness | Foster gratitude for your body

Financial Planning in Marriage and Life

Avoid fights while setting financial goals | Finance tips for Newlyweds | 3 money-management practices for couples 

Prayer Life

Spiritual resolutions from Spoken Bride readers | Praying the Examen | Creative ideas for intercessory prayer | Finding rest in the unknowns with the Litany of Trust

How are you being intentional at the start of a new year? Share your ideas with our community on Instagram and Facebook. 

Wedding Planning | How the Bridal Party Moves through the Ceremony

Wedding planning is not all color schemes and floral arrangements. As you consider the logistics of your wedding ceremony, you will determine how your bridal party will move through the sanctuary and share in the day as primary witnesses of your vows. 

Whether your vows are embedded within a full Mass or not, think through the order of the ceremony with your bridal party in mind. How can their presence and movement make the invisible reality of two becoming one more visible for all in attendance? 

PHOTOGRAPHY: HORN PHOTOGRAPHY & DESIGN

Some decisions may carry more significance and intention than others. Throughout these decisions and dialogues, your priest and the wedding coordinator from your church may offer input and perspective to help you make choices. 

The Procession 

Do bridesmaids and groomsmen process into the sanctuary together or separate?

Do men await the procession of women at the front of the aisle? 

There are many ways to think about the bridal party’s procession. If men and women process into the church together, they represent--from the start--the joining of two lives in a fruitful communion. If men and women process into the church individually, they mirror the procession of the groom and bride, who come into the sanctuary alone yet leave arm-in-arm. When men await the women near the front of the altar, they bring to life a quality of receptivity and patient respect for the woman to open her heart, her garden, as professed through aching desire in The Song of Songs. 

The Welcome 

Does the bridal party immediately go to their seats or do they stand near the altar for the bride’s procession?

Whether the bridal party awaits the bride from their seats or surrounding the groom and celebrant, this movement requires some planning and choreography. As a couple, visualize this moment and imagine your surroundings as you approach the altar together for the first time on this solemn day. The bridal party will have a “front row seat” from either perspective. The choice is yours. 

The Celebration of Matrimony 

Where does the wedding party stand during the Marriage Rite?

As you and your beloved exchange vows, does the bridal party remain at their seats or standing alongside the bride and groom?

During the Marriage Rite, the bride and groom will face each other at the foot of the altar. The priest will join them as he facilitates the exchange of consent and the exchange of rings. In addition, the Maid of Honor and Best Man will stand alongside the bride and groom as primary witnesses--and a second set of hands to offer the rings and hold the bride’s floral bouquet. 

There are options concerning the remainder of the bridal party. In most churches, the bridal party is invited to stand alongside the bride and groom in a horseshoe shape towards the wedding guests. While imagining your church’s environment, the side of your bridal party, and your own desires, should your dear friends and family members stand near the bride and groom, stand at the front of the altar but distanced from the center, or remain seated throughout the Marriage Rite? 

The Recessional 

You’re married! How will the bridal party leave the sanctuary? Will they be arm-in-arm in pairs or walk individually?

Would it help to have a conversation about facial expressions and body language? 

This point of the ceremony may be the simplest decision to make regarding the bridal party’s movement. Most often, the bridal party exits in pairs as they joyfully walk down the aisle behind the new Mr. and Mrs. Nonetheless, it’s important to take the recessional into consideration within the context of the ceremony in order to have a full picture of how the bridesmaids and groomsmen represent the coming together of man and woman in the sacrament. 

Are you married or planning a wedding? Did you consider an option for your bridal party that is not included here? Share it with our community on Facebook or Instagram. 

It's Wedding Season! Distinctively Catholic Tips for Guests and Bridesmaids

Will you be attending one or more weddings this summer and fall?

Beyond basic etiquette and perception, attending or participating in a wedding—Catholic or otherwise—offers a unique opportunity to live out principles of our faith. Here, inspired by the saints’ famous encouragement to “preach the Gospel at all times; if necessary, use words,” our tips for incorporating the Catholic faith into your actions as a wedding guest or bridesmaid.

For Wedding Guests:

Pray for the bride and groom.

The gift of your intercession can only bear fruit in couples’ new lives together, even non-religious couples. Take time to contemplate a particular saint or prayer whose life or spirituality seems well-suited to the bride and groom, and consider beginning a novena in the nine days preceding the wedding. For the weddings of Catholic couples, you might share the prayer with them, invite friends to join you, or note in your card that you have invoked the prayers of our brothers and sisters in heaven.

Find suggested prayers and patrons for Catholic couples here.

Consider giving a religious gift.

The Church is alive and rich with craftsmen, artists, and distinctively Catholic items. Consider giving an off-registry wedding gift as a surprise for the couple, such as religious art, statues, or a family Bible in which they can inscribe their wedding date and--God willing--their future children’s sacramental milestones like Baptism, First Communion, and Confirmation.

Looking for gift ideas? More here: How to Request a Papal Marriage Blessing | Gifts and Décor by Spoken Bride Vendors | Our team’s favorite Catholic gifts for the home | 5 Gift Ideas for Catholic Newlyweds

Find time for a meaningful moment with the couple.

The gift of encounter involves sincere face-to-face time with another, however brief. Reception table visits or receiving lines are a whirlwind for the bride and groom. Though it’s impossible for them to spend extended time with any one guest, strive to make your time with them meaningful: be genuine and honest in the conversation you share; ask them questions; be mindful of their need to make the rounds to as many guests as possible.

It’s also a considerate gesture to thank the parents of the couple at some point during the day, recognizing their financial, spiritual, and emotional contributions to the celebration.

Exemplify reverent dress and prayer.

Without speaking a word, appropriate dress and reverent participation in the Mass can be a powerful witness to non-Catholic or non-practicing guests.

Embody charity.

Much as we might prefer to avoid them, thorny political or religious issues might come up in conversation at your reception table or during the cocktail hour. If you find yourself engaged in a debate, strive for respect and empathy above all. Someone who feels heard and understood is far less defensive than someone who feels attacked by argument: “[conversations like these are] rich with potential opportunities: occasions to truly listen to and see another and to defy stereotypes of what evangelization is all about.”

For Bridesmaids:

Cultivate a heart of service.

Standing by a bride at the altar involves so many tasks, major and minor, that lead to the moment of witnessing her say her vows. As you help her prepare for the big day, pray for a spirit of humility and service: anticipate her needs; willingly take on less fun and glamorous tasks like cleaning up after her bridal shower; pick up last-minute items and run errands for her.  

Will you be the Maid of Honor? More on serving the bride with love.

Give a spiritual bouquet.

With the rest of the wedding party--and, if you like, any other friends and family you’d like to involve (perhaps by asking at her shower)--assemble a spiritual bouquet to present to the bride at the wedding rehearsal. A spiritual bouquet is a collection of prayers and intentions promised by cherished friends, and can be figurative or literal. Read more here about how to plan one.

Consider bringing a spiritual element to pre-wedding events.

If the bridal party is comprised of several Catholic women, consider incorporating elements of prayer, reflection, or worship into the bride’s bachelorette party, bridal shower, and rehearsal. If some bridesmaids are non-Catholic, be sure to extend the invitation to them, as well, and to identify ways they can still feel their presence is valued in these events if they choose to attend.

More here:  Classy and Unconventional Bridal Shower Themes | A Catholic Perspective on Giving Lingerie | Tips for a Spiritually Rich Wedding Rehearsal

We love the uniqueness of every wedding, which reflects the personality and reality of every couple, and love hearing your stories. What are your own tips for Catholic wedding guests and wedding party members? Share in the comments and on Spoken Bride’s social media.

Introducing the Spoken Bride Shop.

Since Spoken Bride’s start in 2016, we have hoped and prayed to share our mission not only through images and the written word, but through the tangible: beautiful, distinctively Catholic products that could serve brides during all stages of engagement, wedding and Mass planning, and newlywed life.

Today, we’re thrilled to share the fruits of those dreams with the launch of the Spoken Bride Shop.

Intentionally designed to offer you simplicity, truth, and expertise in Theology and the wedding industry, our first collections in the shop are visual expressions—and meaningful gifts—that highlight the beauty of marriage. We celebrate celebrate men and women who found fulfillment through their married vocation; we express the truth of our vows; we acknowledge our identity as children of God; we provoke reflection on the holy wisdom of the saints. 

Whether you are a single woman in discernment, an engaged woman preparing for marriage, a newlywed or a bride of many years, we share our hearts with you through the Spoken Bride Shop and pray you are encouraged and inspired to pursue the truth of every woman’s call to be a beloved spouse. 

As our ministry is brought to life in a new way, we share our deepest gratitude and praise for the Holy Spirit’s grace in bringing these dreams to fruition. And we thank you—this community of brides, mothers, vendors, contributors, and readers—for empowering this mission to be a place where God dwells among us.

Click here to view additional listings in the Spoken Bride Shop!

Planning a Bridal Shower? A Catholic Perspective on Lingerie and Lingerie Shower Tips

ANNE MARIE WILLIAMS & BRIDGET HEFFERNAN

In the summer of 2018, Anne Marie received an invitation to a lingerie shower, co-hosted by her friend Bridget. She had some initial misgivings: she’d been to several similar showers in the past and distinctly remembered the discomfort.

Photo: Story Amour

At past parties I’d attended, it felt like we were all there to gawk and catcall, expecting the bride to be “naughty" wearing the gifts she opened. I felt like we were invading her and her husband's bedroom--what was supposed to be their sacred space. Furthermore, taste in lingerie is a pretty personal preference. .

In the end, however, I accepted this particular invitation because I trusted the women organizing it. Bridget and her co-host been my good friends for several years and were Theology of the Body enthusiasts. I didn't know what this party would look like, but I trusted it wouldn't be gross or weird.

The shower was beautiful and tasteful, from the decor and treats to games and the opening of gifts. At one point towards the end, the married women present were invited to share advice from their own marriages. Some of their words reflected tremendous vulnerability, and I truly had a sense of the sacredness of marriage.

Because there can be misgivings or hesitation with this topic among Catholic brides, I asked Bridget to share her perspective and planning tips.

Lingerie showers have a reputation for being more trashy than classy. As super classy ladies yourselves, why was it important to you to throw a lingerie shower specifically?

When planning this bridal shower, we wanted to celebrate the gift of intimacy in marriage--both in Katie, the bride, receiving the gift of William, her husband-to-be, and by giving herself to him.

When you prepare a special gift for someone, you adorn it with beautiful wrapping. That is exactly how we look at lingerie.

The purpose of lingerie, used appropriately, is not to objectify the body, but precisely to emphasize the gift of the body.

I would also add that, beyond the style, the woman's behavior and attitude when wearing lingerie can emphasize one or the other: gift or object. As with so many other things in life, if she has the right perspective towards her own body (and assuming she is marrying a good man), her husband will respond to that.

How did you determine the atmosphere and mood for the shower?

We used a lot of greenery and simple white decorations. A trip to Hobby Lobby resulted in garlands of greenery, some of which we separated from the stem and arranged around the room. In the end, the shower had a garden feel with a feminine flair.

For other Catholic women planning pre-wedding events, can you share the order of events for the day?

First, introductions. Once all of the guests arrived, we sat in a circle and went around the room introducing ourselves and how we knew the bride.

Second, food. We prayed and invited everyone to get food from the other room. We served an assortment of hors d’oeuvres and beverages, including bacon-wrapped, maple-soaked water chestnuts, tomato, basil, and mozzarella skewers, blackberry and basil-infused water, coffee, juice (with the option to add Moscato!), and Blueberry, Lemon, Poppy seed muffins.

Third, sharing stories. While we ate, we went around the room and told the group a fun or funny story about the bride. Before long, the room was filled with laughter. Laughter always bonds!

Fourth, a game called Mixed Up Wisdom. Each guest was given a 3x5 card; on the front, she wrote a common marital problem, and on the back, she a corresponding wise solution (for example: what to do for dinner tonight?). Once everyone was done, we stacked the cards and passed them around. Each person would read the top card’s problem and the bottom card's solution, then put the top card on the bottom and move the stack to the left for the next woman to read. The mixed up combination of problems and solutions was quite hilarious.

Fifth, real wisdom.

We opened the discussion for all the married women in the room to offer real advice or kernels of wisdom they’d learned about creating a happy, healthy, thriving marriage. It was so beautiful to see and hear what they had to share.

Sixth, a simple Mad Libs game we printed from online. We had two teams with different scenarios, which we read aloud at the end. Everyone was rolling with laughter by the time we were through.

Finally, we were ready for the opening of gifts. At this point, I said a few words about the dignity of women and about the beauty and importance of approaching marriage with that understanding of the gift of self.

In view of that, joined one another in giving to Katie, both with beautiful intimate clothing and with our support and prayers. It was beautiful. As she opened the gifts, she and each woman in the room had a sense of joyful reverence for what Katie was anticipating.

After she finished gifts, we all prayed over Katie, that she and William would share a joy-filled, holy marriage, giving witness to the call to give of themselves to each other--as Christ gave of himself to us.

What would you say to someone who might object that a bride's intimate attire--and the marital act it's meant for--is private, not for the theme of a party?

Great question! It goes back to the point of the lingerie. If the point is simply to make a woman  look like a sex object, then I think it has no place in a bridal shower--or frankly, in the bedroom, either.

But if the point is what it ought to be--namely, to adorn--then there is something very beautiful about other women gathering around the bride-to-be and helping her prepare to adorn herself as gift for her future husband.

What feedback did you receive?

We were blown away with how many women said afterwards how beautiful the shower was and how much it meant to them to witness such a reverent and holy, yet joyful approach to preparing a bride for marital intimacy.

---

About the Authors: Anne Marie Williams is a stay-at-home mom to Isaac and Eva Marie and is a part-time Intensive Care Unit nurse from central Illinois. She met her husband on CatholicMatch and they were married in April 2015. She's a firm believer that beautiful, strong marriages change the world. Anne Marie and her husband serve on the PreCana marriage prep retreat team for their diocese. She and Bridget met in 2013 and have been friends ever since.

As a single working professional, Bridget Heffernan enjoys working as a Lean Six Sigma Process Re-Engineering Consultant. However, Bridget's real passion is discovering, seeing, and talking about the beauty of God's handiwork, especially as regards the worth of the human person. As a team member for the monthly diocesan PreCana Retreats, she channels this passion by giving talks on the complementarity of masculinity and femininity, dignity and identity, and the power of sexuality & why sex is worth waiting for. Growing up in the middle of four brothers, she used to be a tomboy. As her understanding of the natural complementarity of masculinity and femininity grew, as well as her appreciation for the strength of the Blessed Mother, her love for authentic femininity grew, as well.

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You are a Beautiful Bride | The Unconditional Truth

STEPHANIE FRIES

As a young flower girl at the weddings of babysitters and family friends, I remember being entranced by the regal aurora of the bride. As an engaged woman in preparation, I was encouraged, “you will be a beautiful bride!” On my own wedding day, I remember hearing the remarks of wedding guests who referred to me as the beautiful bride.

It is true. A woman dressed in white, clothed in the joy and purity of her wedding day is a sight to behold. The crowd of witnesses stands as she enters the sanctuary. The groom can’t take his eyes off of her. The journey of the bride moving towards her covenant at the altar echoes a song of every human’s heart. She is the personification of beauty, a reflection of the creator who makes all things glorious.

PHOTOGRAPHY: RED FERN PHOTOGRAPHY

There is no denying that a woman on her wedding day is a beautiful bride.

Yet hearing the simple statement, “you are a beautiful bride,” brings me to a question. When a woman hears these words, does she interpret the message as admiration of her outer appearance or as affirmation of her heart and soul?

If the message is attached to the status of professional hair and makeup, heirloom jewelry, a wedding gown, and a following of photographers, then her identity as a beautiful bride becomes conditional to external circumstances.

In contrast, when a woman is offered and hears bridal admiration as a reflection of her lifelong commitment to her vocation, her beauty is fused with her existence. She is beautiful because she is. Her daily “yes” to her marriage is her most stunning quality. In the truth of this perspective, her beauty is sealed in her feminine vocation.

Despite our secular culture’s twisted reality which uses outer appearances to define one’s value and worth, God offered his son to remind us that our value is confirmed in his love for us. Our worth is defined in our status as a child of God. Therefore, it becomes imperative to shift our understanding of a “beautiful bride” away from a simple definition of a woman in white, so we can more fully celebrate the innumerable beautiful brides in our midst—the women who strive in the commitment of their married vocation.

How do we begin acknowledging this truth and celebrating true beauty? The responsibility is shared among both men and women, single and married, young and old.

To the bridal attendants and wedding guests:

Say what you mean and mean what you say. We cannot expect others to interpret the deepest meaning of our words. Take time to write a heartfelt note to express the depth of your admiration for a new couple in covenant. Choose your words with intention as you compliment and affirm a bride on her wedding day; your compliment is not only relevant to that day, but the rest of her married life. And on the average days in-between, acknowledge the beauty of the women in your life as they each pursue or fulfill marital vows in a unique way.

To boyfriends, husbands, and men:

Reflect on how you internalize the beauty of your bride. If you look at your bride and are distracted by the external clothing, emotions or demands of married life, pray for the desire to explore and know a deeper intimacy of her heart. If you are married—or desire to be married—and you know the internal beauty of your bride, tell her. From the morning of your wedding day and for the rest of forever, she is your beautiful bride: the embodiment of God’s finest creation put on this earth as a gift for you. Live in that joy.

To single, engaged, and married women:

Once you enter a vocational covenant, you are a bride. Your status in that role is not conditional on how you dress, how professional your hair and makeup look, or how gracefully you move about the day. Through your commitment in covenant, your status as a beautiful bride cannot be changed.

On the days when you feel lost or confused in your vocation, you are a beautiful bride.

On the days when vulnerability in making love brings a moment of embarrassment, you are a beautiful bride.

On the days when you are covered in stains from raising a family, you are a beautiful bride.

On the days when the love between a husband and wife is playful and fun, you are a beautiful bride.

On the days when you doubt your value as a wife but show up offering your very best for that day, you are a beautiful bride.

The woman who enters a vocational covenant is, forevermore, a beautiful bride. As the memories of your wedding day move further back in time, remain steadfastly affirmed in your inherent, unconditional beauty.

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About the Author: Stephanie Fries is Spoken Bride’s Associate Editor. Stephanie’s perfect day would consist of a slow morning and quality time with her husband, Geoff, a strong cup of coffee, and a homemade meal (…with dessert). Read more

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5 Ways to Highlight Your Bridesmaids' Feminine Genius, Inside and Out

Are you currently shopping for bridesmaids’ attire and planning events with the women who will stand by your side at the altar?

Photography: Du Castel Photography

True sisterhood and virtuous friendship are a gift to your marriage, a source of support and intercession that enter into your joys and trials. In his Letter to Women, praising the unique gifts, dignity, and role of women in the world, Saint John Paul II directly thanked “women who are daughters and women who are sisters! Into the heart of the family, and then of all society, you bring the richness of your sensitivity, your intuitiveness, your generosity and fidelity.”

In thanksgiving for the role of these precious female friendships in your life and in the years of marriage to come, here, suggestions for illuminating the feminine genius in your bridesmaids’ attire—and, above all, on the interior.

Look for dresses that flatter a range of feminine beauty.

When a woman feels confident in the clothes she wears, she projects a visible sense of inner contentment and confidence, as well. Radiance. Draw out this beauty in your bridesmaids by seeking out lines that offer a wide range of sizes--including maternity, if necessary--and universally flattering styles. Floor-length dresses, one-shoulder or wrap styles, and A-line silhouettes flatter women of any size and body type.

Mismatch.

The trend of mismatched bridesmaids’ looks, in color, style, or both, continues going strong; consider inviting your maids to pick their own dress within guidelines you’ve chosen, allowing each to wear a piece she feels best complements her skin tone, figure, and taste.

Choose accessories just for them.

The inner uniqueness and unrepeatability of every person is manifest, among other ways, in the way a person dresses and presents herself to the world--and that’s a beautiful and fascinating, revelatory thing! If you’ve opted to give jewelry as a wedding party gift, contemplate each bridesmaid’s personal style and consider picking out a different necklace, saint medal, pair of earrings, or other item that reflects who she is.

Commit to body positivity, together.

The prospect of being photographed, processing up the aisle, and giving speeches is enough to make any woman desire to look and feel her best. If you or any of your bridesmaids share the goal of getting in shape before the wedding day, strive for a healthy attitude and spirit of encouragement, not of self-criticism. If these women are your closest friends, you likely wouldn’t dream of speaking to them harshly about their bodies and self-image.

Yet when it comes to our own selves, we as women are so quick to perceive only flaws. Surround yourself with your friends, and build each other up. If fitness is important to you as the big day approaches, consider taking a workout class together, meeting for weekly hikes or runs, or even doing videos at home together. Focus not on weight loss, but on strength--both outer and inner.

Give of your time, and your heart.

If time allows, spending one-on-one time with each of your bridesmaids during your engagement wonderfully commemorates your relationship as the transition into marriage approaches. Have a coffee or dinner date, go to Adoration together, or visit a shared favorite spot.

The Scriptures and lives of the saints are rich with strong, compassionate women who stood by their friends, some even unto death: Ruth and Naomi, Felicity and Perpetua, Clare and Francis, Brigid and Patrick. Your wedding celebrations present a unique opportunity to celebrate the female friendships in your life, as well.

We love hearing your own rituals and ideas. How have you honored the women in your wedding party?

Readers Share | The Saints Who've Shaped Your Relationships

This week as the Church celebrates the dead, the communion of saints, and all souls in Purgatory on All Hallow’s Eve, All Saints Day, and All Souls Day, respectively, we invited you to share the holy men and women who’ve interceded in your spiritual lives and relationships on our social media.

For inviting us and others into your deep joy, for fostering hope in God’s faithfulness in women still awaiting their love story, for witnessing to abandon and reckless trust in the Father, thank you. Your responses were too many to list in a single post--let alone to list every woman who cited Our Lady, Saints Therese, John Paul II, or Louis and Zelie Martin as favorite patrons! We read every single one and find each so uniquely, personally beautiful.

Here, a selection of your stories of saintly intercession:

St Gemma - for many reasons! My husband is a pharmacist, I was seeking employment when we were first married and we both recently lost our fathers. She’s the patron saint of: Pharmacists, children who have lost parents and those seeking employment! - Danielle

Blessed Emperor Karl of Austria and his wife, Servant of God, Empress Zita. They were a beautiful Catholic married couple and have been a great role model for our marriage. - @danielleduet

St. Michael the Archangel. His battle courage was inspiring to me, and helped me in my own spiritual warfare. Like St. Michael, I was able to cast my own demons out. - @_desirita_

St. Therese and St. Zelie Martin. I’ve struggled with finding and being content in my vocation, and through their intercession have received many graces. - @thebrownebunch

St. Raphael. I met my soon-to-be fiancé through Catholic Match and Raphael's intercession throughout our relationship has been so influential. He's the patron saint of their website and the hero of our relationship. - @violetsheabee

St. Therese has had (and continues to have) a profound impact on how myself in relationship with my fiancé. Long distance has required a lot of humility and trust on both of our parts, and I've leaned on her Little Way to help me do small things that benefit our relationship with each other and with God. - @meganboes

St. Joseph! The St. Joseph novena played a big role in both our individual discernment journeys. As a couple, any time we have a difficult situation and don't know what to pray for, we say his novena, and always receive exactly what we need, and then some! Plus, all the men in my family have Joseph as their middle name, and so does my husband! - @acrgripshover

Our Lady of Angels. - @i.marie.daly

St. Anthony. - @vegan_wannabe_81

I got engaged on the feast of Our Lady of the Rosary, by the grace of God and through the intercession of St. Joseph, Mama Mary, and St. Anne. - @meganaosborn

St. Thomas More, Mother Mary and St. Joseph. - @marie_xavier_felix

St. Maria Goretti. - @paigealexandrahussey

St. Therese, St. Faustina, and the Holy Family! -@becca_from_texas

St. Josemaria Escriva. - @akeeshers

St. Therese of Lisieux and St. Cecilia! My senior year of college, while my husband and I were still dating, I felt a call to a religious vocation. I was so confused about it so I prayed countless novenas to Therese--I didn’t hear an immediate response, but I eventually did. That spring break, some girlfriends and I drove to Nashville for a retreat with the Dominican Sisters of St. Cecilia (Cecilia is one of my faves because I’m a musician). While I loved it there, I felt a peace within my heart that I was called to marriage. Two years later, my husband proposed. - @josieweisenberger

St. Gianna Molla and her husband, Pietro! We named our first born after her! - @thetinymangia

Our Lady and St. Louis de Montfort. - @maddy__anne__

St. Joseph! My parents did a novena to St Joseph to pray for a husband for me and weeks into the novena, [my future spouse] came along! And we got engaged on May 1, the Feast of St Joseph the Worker. - @rachelgmz

St. Therese of Lisieux! Ever since I was a young girl, I have been praying novenas to her in the hopes of finding my future husband. She is my patron saint, and my fiancé's favorite. We asked her special intercession for our relationship on a recent trip to the National Shrine in DC, and he proposed on her feast day this year, along with a beautiful white rose! - @whateverisgracious

Our guardian angels! - @ann.elissa

St. Ignatius of Loyola. My husband and I would pray his Prayer for Generosity while we were dating and it was a constant reminder to serve the other person. - @jessie.dupre

St. Elia. - @soulachreim

St. Monica, St. Anne, and St.  Michael...mother Mary above all. - @scenescerity.images

St. Jude. I began his novena and on the last day saw [my future husband] Wesley, and knew I should see where things went with him. After that we have prayed to him every night and I began seeing St. Jude everywhere. Now, Wesley and I are getting married [this fall] (2 years after I began my novena)! - @rach_whalen

Our Lady Undoer of Knots, Saint Joseph, Saint Anne, Saint Anthony, Saint Michael, Saint Jude Thaddeus, Saint Raphael, and Saint Dymphna. I keep adding them! - @edna_songz

Saint Veronica. She has inspired me to wipe my husband’s face as he carries his crosses. She reminded me what we are called to do as brothers and sisters in Christ and had a profound role in shaping our relationship. - @brittbritt_ottens

Sts. Louis and Zelie Martin, St. Therese’s parents. The man who is courting me and I had to go two months without seeing each other when we began our relationship. He sent me a talk about sanctification in marriage, which focused on their lives; since then, we have continuously asked for their intercession as we discern marriage! They have become a major influence for me and we are thankful to have another beautiful couple to look up to! - @alynacampero

Saint Therese of Lisieux; she is always reminding us to give ourselves fully to each other and to never seek anything in return. She teaches us how (in Story of a Soul) to live life in a way that strives for selfless love and complete humility. And her parents guide us in how we will want to raise our kids someday. - @maddie7548

To each of you who responded to or have been moved by this question and its answers, we are grateful. If you have suggestions for future reader-sourced topics, be sure to share them with us for consideration!

Images by Lionhearted Photography, seen in Amy + Jake | Midwinter Mountain Wedding

When You're the Maid of Honor

CAROLYN SHIELDS

We spent hours of our childhood dreaming of this day: what our dresses would look like, how the man would react as we walked down the aisle to him, and so on. Olivia fell in love first, with a marine (she set the bar high). Watching my sister-not-by-blood fall in love was honor enough, but when she asked me to stand by her on her wedding day, I was flushed with warm admiration. It was an honor to participate in so many small, intimate ways that weekend; something I will truly cherish forever.

Photography: Horn Photography & Design as seen in Katie and Ted's Classic Summer Wedding

Listening to her tiptoe upstairs the night before, having that moment together to eat toast and sip coffee the morning of, when the earth was defrosting itself, is a cherished memory. Standing behind the church doors, as I straightened her dad's tie, she whispered, "Carolyn?" And I turned.

"Do I look okay?"

My eyes smarted with tears as I straightened her veil once more and tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. She pulled me into a hug, kissed my cheek, and told me she loved me. And then I had to go ahead of her.

So you're here, too--the Maid of Honor? I'm sure you're feeling just as honored as I did. Sisterhood is something so beloved, so I want to share ways to incorporate as much prayer into your best friend's day as possible. And if you're like me, I no longer lived close to the bride during her engagement, and couldn't run across the street to her house like we did when we were little. I wasn’t able to walk over and help her tie 150 ribbons for her favors.

But you can do the following, no matter how far apart you and the bride are.

Pray for her guests.

I was privileged to write out Olivia's wedding invitations, something I could do on quiet evenings in my apartment three hours away. As I wrote out her guests’ names, I realized just how many names I didn't recognize. I was curious as to who these people were, people who meant so much to Olivia and her fiancé that they were invited to join them on their big day. So over each envelope, I thanked God for their presence in the bride and groom’s lives.

I also wrote out her escort cards. Over each of these, I prayed for each guest’s safe arrival to the ceremony and reception.

Create a spiritual bouquet.

I know it's tradition to collect the ribbons from bridal shower gifts to build a bouquet for the bride to carry at her rehearsal. When I tried, it was the saddest-looking thing ever! So instead, I reached out to Olivia's friends and mine to create a spiritual bouquet. I bought white roses and scribbled the sacrifices, novenas, rosaries, and prayers our friends offered for Olivia, tying  them with twine onto the flowers. I thought she would feel more comfortable walking down the aisle holding a bouquet of prayer (some from women she’d never met) than one made of ribbon!

Take a moment to pray over her.

Even if you don’t often pray in this way, in that moment when she looks immaculate, it's minutes before go time, and the butterflies are raging, she’ll welcome it. Invite the bridesmaids to join you in prayer, place a warm palm on her shoulder for physical support, and let your heart sing its praise.

Reflect on honor.

That's who you are! The Maid of Honor. What does it mean to honor someone? What does honor deserve? What place does honor have in our faith? If we believe our Holy is who he says Hh is, then we must understand who we are.

And on this weekend, on that altar, that's what you represent.

---

About the Author: Carolyn Shields is the founder of The YoungCatholicWoman and is fresh off of the wedding of her sister (she set up the bride and groom!). Her current projects include web design and engagement and wedding photography. 

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Editors' Picks | Vol. 13: 2018 Bridesmaid Trends

At Spoken Bride, we love a good book, a good meal, a standout statement necklace, a heel you can dance in, and the list goes on. And when we make those discoveries, we want to tell everyone. So every month or two, we're sharing our latest and favorite finds in everything engagement, wedding, and honeymoon-related.

Your wedding provides an opportunity to showcase the unique gifts, tastes, and inner and outer beauty of the women you're closest to. Today, we're sharing our favorite trends for bridesmaids that help you accomplish just that.

Photography: KT Crabb Photography, seen in Chelsy + Ben | Feast of the Annunciation Wedding

Jiza, Co-Founder & Creative Director

Mismatched dresses: Instead of matching bridesmaids dresses of the same color and same style, this is when the bride assigns a different color and/or fabric to each bridesmaid according to her wedding’s color scheme. As a photographer, I love the look coordinating dresses creates. It creates visual appeal in an image with the varying textures and color. Chances are, your bridesmaids are also happier and more comfortable in their dresses, because each was able to pick something for her own body. This can also help your bridesmaids find a dress within their budget—with online shopping today, searching for a dress is easier than ever.

Bridesmaid hangers: We commonly see dress shots with a beautiful hanger for only the bride. However, with bridesmaids’ dresses becoming more and more unique, it is also lovely having some additional dress photos with their gowns, as well. You may want to first dispose of the plastic hangers, and if you are in search of a good bridesmaids gift, a personalized hanger is both pretty and practical.

Non-traditional bouquets: This is becoming more and more popular, which I couldn’t be more excited about. Corsages are no longer limited to the mothers anymore--bridesmaids are wearing them now, too. Instead of a traditional bouquet, your bridal party can carry lanterns or floral hoops or wreaths. Or for something minimal yet still eye-catching, one singular, large flower with simple greenery, such as a magnolia, a dahlia, or a peony, is beautiful. Speak with your floral designer for unique ideas!

Andi, Business Director

Patterned and floral dresses: I love that we’ve branched out from all-matching dresses to coordinating styles that flatter every body, and now on to prints and florals for the bridal party. Some brides have their Maid of Honor wear a floral gown and the other ladies coordinating colors; others have all their maids in vibrant prints. It’s such a fun way to personalize your wedding!

Renting gowns: I’m a huge fan of this trend! It’s great not to have to purchase anything, and there are several options like Rent the Runway and other retailers specifically geared toward weddings.

Stephanie, Co-Founder & Editor in Chief

Pajamas: Especially with fall and winter weddings upon us, PJ’s are an inspired alternative to robes as you and your ladies prepare for the day. From cozy plaids to crisp oxford piping to delicate boho trim, there are plenty of sets available to suit any wedding aesthetic and budget.

Fresh skin: With moves like unretouched ads, lines offering dozens of foundation shades, and campaigns featuring models (or real women!) of different sizes and races, I find the beauty industry’s current vibe of inclusivity long overdue and so praiseworthy. I hope over time, the trend becomes more than a short-lived fad, but simply a norm and expectation, showcasing a true range of feminine beauty.

This sensibility is evident in makeup trends, as well: after a few years of matte, poreless looks with heavy coverage and contour, I love seeing an increase in dewy skin, freckles showing through, and making peace with lines and natural texture. Encouraging your bridesmaids or makeup artist to embrace each woman’s unique features still photographs beautifully and allows their outer appearance to make visible the radiance of their inner selves.

Millenial pink: If the product design, websites, and clothing I see everywhere are any indication, this shade shows no signs of going away any time soon. For bouquets, nails, or your main wedding color, soft pink flatters all skin tones and can function almost as a neutral. And depending on your taste and other wedding details, it can skew minimalist, romantic, or preppy.

We love hearing your own inspirations. Have you, or will you, incorporate any of these trends into your wedding party? Share in the comments and on our social media what selections you've made for your bridesmaids' attire, gifts, florals, and otherwise!
 

Editors' Picks | Vol. 12: Favorite Love Stories

At Spoken Bride, we love a good book, a good meal, a standout statement necklace, a heel you can dance in, and the list goes on. And when we make those discoveries, we want to tell everyone. So every month or two, we're sharing our latest and favorite finds in everything engagement, wedding, and honeymoon-related.

The best romances direct our earthly emotion and longings to the Holy One, the beloved of our souls whose love is bottomless. Today, we're sharing the love stories that inspire us from literature, movies, TV, and the lives of the saints.

Photography: Vanessa Velez Photo, c/o The Mantilla Co.

Jiza, Co-Founder + Creative Director

Anne Shirley and Gilbert Blythe from the Anne of Green Gables series: Oh, where to begin?! There is something about Anne and Gil that will always give my stomach butterflies or make my heart skip a beat. I love Gil’s devoted pursuit of Anne and that he loves her for who she is, even when she is absolutely stubborn and unreasonable. From their early rivalry to their friendship to their eventual marriage, this fictional romance is one of my all-time favorites.

Chiara Corbella Petrillo and her husband, Enrico: Chiara is a young Italian wife and mother who died in 2012 of carcinoma. When you read her biography, Chiara Corbella Petrillo: A Witness to Joy, written by her friends Simone Troisi & Cristiana Paccini, the beginning delves a great deal into Chiara and Enrico’s roller coaster courtship. Their marriage, too, was also not short of great suffering and sacrifice up until her death. Their relationship is real, gritty, and painful, yet still full of joy, trust, and redemption. In a world that idolizes the appearance of a curated, blissful marriage, I find great consolation in Chiara and Enrico and their absolute surrender to always serve God and do His will, no matter how much it hurts.

Andi, Business Director

Jim and Pam from The Office: this has got to be one of the most down-to-earth, relatable love stories out there (you know you cried at their wedding!). From the start I loved how Jim and Pam were friends; their relationship just slowly grew from there, and the show drew it out over a few seasons because real life is messy and doesn’t always happen on our schedule. Jim was so patient and it was worth it in the end!

Mary and Joseph: As I recently prayed the Joyful Mysteries of the rosary, I was reflecting on the theological virtue of hope, and Mary and Joseph came to my mind. Saint Joseph shows us so much trust in the Lord when he decides to marry Mary, despite the unexpected news of the Word becoming flesh in her womb. They both show us hope by trusting in God’s plan for their marriage and family, even with all the unexpected circumstances they had to endure.

Ella and Kit from Cinderella (2015): I had very low expectations going into this Disney remake and ended up blown away by the tenderness and affection that grew between Cinderella and Prince Kit. So much depth, personality, and actual motivations were given to these characters, and it made them so real! I think my favorite aspect of their relationship is the purity it’s portrayed with: neither had the intent to use the other for their own purposes, and neither felt worthy of the other, allowing real love to grow.

Stephanie, Co-Founder + Editor in Chief

Kitty Scherbatsky and Konstantin Levin from Anna Karenina: Tolstoy’s novel is most famous for its portrayal of a love story gone off the rails, via the affair conducted by the title character. So I found myself surprised, as well as incredibly moved, when I read the book for the first time and discovered that in contrast to Anna’s infidelity and emotional caprice, the story also traces the development of another relationship, one rooted in constancy and personal growth. The romance between Kitty and Levin matures as each grows in awareness of human nature and suffering, culminating in one of the most beautiful proposals I’ve ever encountered--fictional or real.

Saint Gianna Molla and her husband Pietro: Saint Gianna, to me, is a woman of vocation. She embraced all the Lord called her to in both gladness and trials; her decision to give birth to her fourth child at the cost of her own life embodied our ultimate call, as Christians, to lay down our lives. Her sacrifice is heroic, yet what stands out to me most is the ordinariness of who she was, in the best way: a 20th-century working mother, like so many of us, who desired to create a joyful and peaceful home for her family. The number of canonized married saints is few, so I am grateful for the poetry and encouragement I’ve found in the letters exchanged between Gianna and her beloved husband, Pietro. They cared for one another with a beautiful regard for one another’s spiritual well-being, with a sweet tenderness, and even a holy boldness--feeling certain of her devotion to Pietro, who was the shyer of the two, Gianna was the first to say I love you, expressing her desire for a lifelong commitment and family!

Tami and Eric Taylor from Friday Night Lights: I consider myself emotional when it comes to love (read: crying over practically every Spoken Bride wedding submission), but I’m not easily swayed by shallow sentiment or sweeping gestures. I find the real and the messy romantic, because that’s who we, as humans, are. It’s what I love in the relationship between Coach Taylor and his wife. I truly can’t think of another TV marriage that is so realistically and positively portrayed: one rooted in abiding trust and good will, even when frustrated by life and work’s demands, one that doesn’t blow problems out of proportion for the sake of drama but confronts them with honesty and respect, and one with expressions of endearment and physical affection that feel so unaffected and true to life.

Did we include your favorite couple on this list? Share the love stories you love in the comments and on our social media.